The Remedy
by Bruteaous
Summary: What if Lenara Kahn had stayed with Jadzia on Deep Space Nine instead of leaving?
1. An Untold Story

_**The Remedy**_

**Disclaimer:** I do not own DS9 or any of its character, although I sometimes wish I did! Please take note, this is a fan fiction. This will not be published or violate copy write law in any form.

**Note to the Text:** This is funny. So far I have planned three Dax and Kahn fanfics, but none of them really go with one another in sequential order, so you do not have to read one to understand the other because they are, each one set in a different universe and if you take them a chronological you might get confused because they contradict each other. Thanks!

**Chapter One: An Untold Story**

_"You think you know a story, but you only know how it ends. To get to the heart of the story you must go back to the beginning."_

_**Year 2373**_

_**Deep Space Nine, the Alpha Quadrant**_

Major Kira Nerys walked down the promenade at a sedate pace. Thankfully, it had been a quiet afternoon with very little wormhole activity to worry about. It was almost evening, though the stars outside the windows of Deep Space Nine gave the illusion of almost constant night. It had been a strange day. The beginning of the workday had been normal, but the afternoon had sported a reception set up to be hosted to welcome a visiting group of Bajoran officials. Every senior staff member had been expected to be present and like normal, every officer had showed up in their dress uniforms. Today was the welcome and tomorrow would be the negotiations with the Emissary. The day had ended with the reception and now that the festivities were over, the senior staff were off duty.

Kira had been released from her work, with no real place to go in mind yet.

"Dabo!" Echoed out from the inside of Quark's bar to meet her.

As she passed it. There was always someone winning on the Dabo wheel, despite Quark's best attempts to cheat everyone who played the game. Only a small fraction of his profit came from losses at the wheel. Under normal circumstances, the major found the game and those who played it to be despicable, but for some reason today she was curious to find out who was winning all of that money off of Quark. Quietly she walked into the bar coming to stand next to Constable Odo, who was leaning stiffly against a support beam while watching the spectacle take place.

"Odo." Kira nodded in acknowledgement.

"Major." The constable inclined his head in return.

"It must be quite a game. You can hear the cheers all the way from the promenade." Kira mentioned, her view of who was winning the game obscured by the crowd gathered at the wheel. "I bet Quark's not all too thrilled about someone taking all of his money."

"He's dealing with it." Odo gave her a curt smile.

"Who's the winner?" Kira asked smiling at his side.

"Commander Dax, who else?" Odo replied.

"Figures." Kira said. "Excuse me, Odo."

"Major." The constable gave her another nod.

And the major walked past Odo and began getting closer to the wheel. She finally ebbed in between two raucous spectators and came to stand beside the stations science officer.

"I'm winning." Jadzia turned to her with a beaming smile.

"I could tell." Nerys replied echoing the grin on the Trill's face. "You can hear the cheers all the way out to the promenade."

"Would you like to play?" Jadzia asked, a childlike gleam to her cobalt blue eyes.

Kira shook her head. "No, I am not all that interested in gambling."

"You really should give it a try. It's a lot of fun." Jadzia tried to coax.

Kira sighed and slowly walked up to the wheel, Dax smiling encouragingly the whole time. Finally up to the wheel, Kira took a hold of one of the main spokes and albeit reluctantly, gave the wheel a hard spin. The ball on the wheel flew and bounced and finally landed on the appropriate square.

"Dabo!" The crowd gathered around the game shouted again and then broke into a chorus of cheering for the major.

Dax slapped Kira on the back with another smile. "See how fun that was?"

Kira smiled and nodded lightly.

Quark grumbled as he came near them, a serving tray of empty glasses in one hand. "That's another one. I don't know why I let you play, you're bad for business. How can a decent Ferengi expect to make any profit?"

The Trill commander leaned over and awarded the Ferengi bartender a sympathy kiss on the cheek. "I know and I thank you for letting me play the game anyway."

"Well, when you thank me so nicely." Quark murmured as he returned to the bar to continue serving drinks, a little spring in his step as he went.

Major Kira Nerys who was sitting beside Dax at the table laughed, shaking her head as Jadzia bowed as to her applauding audience. Even after years of friendship, the Trill's lighthearted antics could still manage to make her laugh. Their personalities were a contrast to one another, maybe that's why they were such good friends. Kira had a tendency to be more serious, always focused on what bad could happen while Jadzia was almost the opposite, like a blithe child most of the time unless it was a time where she was required to think seriously. Other than that, her willingness to face the more worse off side of life was quite often placed on a high shelf, off to the side until needed. Jadzia lived life for what it was, to the fullest everyday.

To some extent Kira admired her ability to live almost as if there wasn't a greater care in the world until the time of reckoning, until that one moment when seriousness was needed. It was like a check and control type of thing and the Trill had it down pat. Kira watched as Jadzia reached out to spin the wheel again and sent it on its way around in a few fluid circles. _Oh, well,_ Kira sighed mentally. Even if she didn't have that conditioned ability, at least she had a friend who did.

Though she admired Jadzia's zeal for life, Kira did not discredit her own personal approach to life. She was cautious and she had never regretted it. That caution had kept her alive throughout the years, had helped her survive and she would never regret having it. The Dabo wheel was hurled one last time, but his time Dabo was not won. The crowd 'oohed' and Jadzia shrugged with a smile on her face.

Quark appeared again, this time with a full tray of drinks. He bent over the table Jadzia and Kira had settled at and set a black hole down in front of the Trill.

"First one of the day." Jadzia quipped.

"I'm surprised Lenara hasn't broken you of that habit." Kira shot back, raising an eyebrow.

"She likes me just the way I am." Jadzia replied taking a sip of her drink.

"Lucky for you." Kira said with a smirk.

"Anything for you, Major?" Quark asked in passing.

"No, thank you. I don't plan on staying." Kira replied.

Quark nodded and moved on, answering the calls of other thirsty gamers waiting at their tables for their drinks.

"So, where are you headed after you leave here?" Jadzia asked as she took another long sip of the dark beverage.

"My quarters, probably." Kira responded. "I received a new volume of Ija Beru's poems just last week and I have been struggling to find time to read it. Now would be as good as a time as any, I guess."

"Do you have dinner plans?" Jadzia asked setting the empty glass back down on the table quietly.

"No, why? What did you have in mind?" Kira asked suspicious of the smile playing on Dax's face. She knew that smile.

"Would you like to have dinner with Lenara and me tonight?" Jadzia asked. "I know she won't mind."

"Oh, I don't want to impose." Kira replied shaking her head. "Thank you, but I should probably get the crew schedule for this next week organized tonight anyway."

"Alright." Jadzia nodded, her smile disappearing momentarily, but reappearing almost as quickly and just as brightly. "Have fun with those crew schedules this evening."

"I'll try." Kira said standing up. "I'll see you tomorrow morning on the bridge, commander."

Jadzia raised her hand to her head in salute and mock seriousness. "Aye, major. See you at 0500 hours!"

Kira nodded and left Quark's bar. Jadzia sat there for a moment more, staring in to the bottom of her empty glass and the table beneath. It had been a relatively calm day, but a long one. Everything had been peaceful for a couple weeks now. The humdrum of everyday life on the bridge was a blessing in disguise, really. As long as it meant no blood had to be shed, that was the most important thing. The Trill commander would take an easy day at Ops any day rather than the promise of bloodshed over the wormhole. She to admit though, her desire to embark on so adventure to another place on some ridiculous mission was growing with every stagnate hour.

Despite the yearning in her burning for adventure, Jadzia was happy with her life on the station. Life on the station was something she treasured. The senior staff, her friends, had become her family; even more so to her than some of her own blood relatives. Deep Space Nine had become her home, one not easily left or forgotten and her job had become what she lived to do. But the complete other half of her world was working in the Science lab, perfecting her latest theory at this very moment.

Lenara Kahn, her friend, her love, her wife, her everything. She had become all of that and much more over the last few months. Lenara completed her, sustained her, and gave her a new will to be careful. The last thing Jadzia wanted Lenara to have to go through would be a repeat of what Torias and Nilani had. No, she deserved so much more than that. She was worth more than that to her. Jadzia's love of thrill and adventure would have to play second fiddle to the caution she was prepared to institute out of respect for the feelings of the one she loved. This pattern would have to continue so long as hostilities between the Federation and the Dominion remained at a standstill until some type of agreement could be reached. Yes, she would be careful…at least for now.

Jadzia swallowed as she sank into further thoughts of the one person who commandeered her affections above all. To the green eyes which changed color based on her mood from the most even and speckled of greens to the clearest of all brilliant blues. Or of the perfect smile, made all the more perfect when it was directed at her. The silken golden-brown hair, fairer than the strands of any costly fabric on any planet's market. And then there was the complete and wonderful ensemble of the woman herself. There was nothing that could make Jadzia feel more complete than the feel of Lenara in her arms. The last thing she wanted to do was leave Lenara to be a lonely widow again…like Nilani had been. It would not be fair to her.

"I though you'd back me up!" O'Brien complained as he and Bashir stepped down the stairs from the holodeck.

"I would of, but I didn't expect you to go right for the command control station under a mirage of enemy fire!" Bashir shot back as they reached the ground floor.

"It was a dodge tactic!" O'Brien argued.

"It was suicide!" Bashir retorted as the two of them made their way over to where they noticed Dax sitting at a table.

"What did he do this time?" Jadzia asked with a characteristic smile.

"He dive bombed a Jerry base without any back up." Julian answered pulling out a chair and sitting down beside Dax.

"I would have had backup if you would have helped me." O'Brien grumbled signaling for his usual from Quark.

"And I would have helped you if you would have given me fair warning." Julian reprimanded.

"Oh, bugger me!" O'Brien sighed rolling his eyes as Rom handed him his logger.

"Sounds like you guys had quite an afternoon." Jadzia interjected.

"Boy did we ever!" O'Brien shook his head before he took a long draft of his drink.

Dax stood up and pushed her chair in. "Well, I hope you boys have a better evening."

"Where are you going?" Julian asked sipping on the tea he was brought.

"I have a dinner date." Dax smiled down at them.

"Have a good evening." O'Brien added with a nod.

"I will." Jadzia grinned.

Julian returned the smile. "Good night, Dax."

"Have a good night, boys." Jadzia replied coyly as she turned on her heel and left Quark's.

It would be a great night…she was planning on it.

------

Jadzia entered her quarters quietly, setting her shoes by the door and unbuttoning the choking collar of her dress uniform. She used two fingers to separate the edge of the collar from where it was determined to stick to the tortured skin of her neck. For some reason she always felt like a dog in this uniform, fully fitted with the collar and everything.

She meandered comfortably over to the replicator and placed her order. "One bottle of Ginger wine with two glasses and a flute of Ktarian Merlot, please."

The beverages materialized. Jadzia picked up the bottle of Ginger wine first and the two glasses and carried them over to the small table in her eating area, then returned for the glass of merlot. She paced slowly back in forth in front of the bay window and the view of the stars she loved so much. She set the glass down on the coffee table after quickly draining it of its contents as she continued to walk to and fro.

Jadzia could not believe it. A feeling had struck her that had not plagued her since she met Lenara for the second time: nervousness. She was nervous. The calm, cool commander always eager for jokes, wild parties, gambling, and fighting was…nervous. Having the full unsheathed blade of a Bat'leth in the hands of a murderous foe pressed against her throat couldn't invoke this same feeling in her as this.

One of her hands dove into her pocket to toy with the little black box resting there. Jadzia pulled it out and ran her fingers over the velvet skin of the container reverently. It was an heirloom, a jewel that she had bartered for during her last trip to Dahkur with Kira just last month. The moment she caught sight of it in the shop, she knew it was what she wanted for this night when it came. It had taken more than an hour of debate between the silversmith and herself to end in parlay over the just the right price.

Jadzia took a deep breath. She had to calm down. This wasn't characteristic of the audacious Trill who treasured every day as a new beginning and every risk as a new opportunity. She wasn't used to feeling like this. _But love has a tendency to do that to you_, a little voice in her mind replied and she had to smile. It was right. Whose ever voice it had belonged to, from Lela to Curzon, it had been right.

Just then the door opened automatically and Lenara Kahn walked in leisurely. She entered and smiled when she saw Dax standing before the window, framed in galactic light.

"It's a beautiful evening." Lenara said as she walked over to where Commander Dax stood and stopped in front of her with a contented smile.

"It's not anything compared to you." Jadzia said releasing the breath she wasn't aware she had been holding.

"You flatter me." Lenara stated in sophisticated banter. "Though I am sure the good doctor would agree I could use some improvement."

Jadzia reached out and took her hand in hers, giving it a reassuring squeeze. "It's your first year working as an assistant in the infirmary and I am sure you're doing splendidly. You have to remember you're learning something new, so it'll be trying at first, but Julian says you're doing magnificently. In his own words, 'No one takes a blood count like you'."

Lenara smiled and nodded. "You're right. I'm being silly. It's only natural I would feel a bit inadequate at the first try, that's normal when you start any job. "

"Exactly." Jadzia nodded closing the distance between them in one step. "Now, I've had a long day and I've worked hard, what do I get for it?"

Lenara shook her head, but with a benevolent smile in place. "So you expect a reward for your hard work? "

"I figured you wouldn't object seeing how special this day is for us." Jadzia replied.

She brought one hand up to Lenara's face, running her fingers delicately down her spots while grazing lovingly over her neck and jaw line. Lenara closed her eyes and leaned into the tender touch. There was nothing she could remember in her whole life that made her feel this whole, this alive, this absolute. Jadzia watched the other relax as she held her. She truly was beautiful, everything about her from the way she woke up beside her in the morning from the time they settled down for bed at night, there was nothing she would trade for the experience of holding her in her arms like this.

There was no such comparable form of riches that could even come close to the wealth standing before her, nothing she valued more than the heart of this amazing woman she was very fortunate to call her own. Forgetting everything else, Jadzia leaned forward and captured Lenara's lips in a affectionate kiss. I was magically and none could miss the spark that flew down their spine's at first feel of the other's touch or the warmth that gradually spread through them. But it was a short kiss and it ended almost as quickly as it had started.

Jadzia smiled as she pulled back and opened her eyes. "Thanks for the reward."

Lenara smiled warmly. "Anytime."

Jadzia motioned to the table in the eating area and the chairs that surrounded it. "Would you like to sit down."

They walked over to the table and Dax pulled out a chair for the scientist. Then she leaned over and poured a glass full of Ginger wine, handing it to Lenara when she was finished.

"Thank you." Lenara nodded courteously.

Jadzia walked over the replicator and placed another order, this time for food. "Two plates of Deppa pasta with a bowl of Scavean sauce and a basket of bread."

The food materialized and Jadzia prepared to show off a newly acquired skill. She balanced the plates on one outstretched arm and carried over the basket of bread in one handand the bowl of sauce with the other.

"Oh, let me help you." Lenara offered pushing her chair back.

"No, don't get up." Jadzia said moving very slowly over to the table. Once there she safely set the bread down and then went for the other dishes one at a time. "I've been practicing."

"I'm impressed." Lenara replied as the plate of pasta was laid down in front of her with ease.

"I hoped you would be." Jadzia smiled as she poured her own glass full of the honey colored Ginger wine. When she was finished she raised her glass to the woman before her. "To you, in honor of everything you've accomplished and to us, in honor of everything we've achieved over the last few months."

"Indeed." Lenara raised her glass to clink with Jadzia's. "To us."

Both took their first sip of the golden-brown liquid, letting the natural sweetness of the Ginger Wine flood their senses. Lenara set her glass down first.

"Well, this looks delicious." She said spreading her napkin over her lap. "A traditional Trillian pasta dish, how appropriate."

"You once told me it was your favorite traditional dish." Jadzia replied as she wrapped some of the long golden strands of pasta around her fork.

"It is." Lenara replied spreading the hot white sauce eagerly over the bed of steaming noodles.

They ate in relative silence. The air between them was comfortable as they enjoyed their food, together without a care in the world. After they were finished, both Lenara and Jadzia cleared the table and piled the dishes back into the replicator for recycling. Lenara dropped her plates off first and came to stand before the window, looking out into the stars as Jadzia took care of her plates.

"It really is beautiful from space." Lenara commented, crossing her arms in front of her chest for warmth. It got so cold here.

"The stars?" Jadzia asked as she quickly jumped over to take care of her merlot glass.

Lenara nodded. "The constellations." She remembered bitterly. "Even the wormhole, does not look so imposing from up here."

"I suppose not." Jadzia came to stand beside her. "Or perhaps I've just become to used to seeing it all the time."

Lenara smiled in memory. "It was on this day six months ago when I made the decision to stay on this station with you. Do you remember?"

"How could I ever forget?" Jadzia thought back as she enveloped Lenara in a warm embrace. "I had come to your quarters to see how you were recovering from your injuries and Bajal was here. He thanked me for saving your life and left, albeit reluctantly. I sat down and handed you a bottle of Risian perfume, the brand you had told me you liked. Then I knelt down in front of you and asked you to stay here with me. You were hesitant at first." Jadzia's smile faltered for a moment, reflecting only a shadow of her former mirth. "We fought about it and I left, angry. I moped around all the rest of that night. I was sure you were going to leave me."

Lenara reached up and touched her cheek. "But I didn't leave you."

Dax smiled again as she held that hand to the side of her face. "No, you came to me that evening and told me that you were going to stay with me. It was one of the happiest moments of my life when I heard you say those words."

Jadzia brought the hand to her lips and kissed it caringly.

"I couldn't bear to leave you and I didn't know if I could go through losing you all over again just for the sake of society." Lenara said sincerely. "So I stayed and I've never regretted that decision."

Jadzia held the hand to her cheek respectfully. She was honestly elated that Lenara had made the choice she had, but a part of her was still a bit unbelieving, doubtful that this dream she was living really was real. "Not even after all that's happened?"

Lenara saw the doubt in those crystal clear eyes, the love and hope for it to continue. Without another thought, Lenara leaned up and kissed Jadzia gently, hoping for the action to say more than her words ever could. She tried to pull back, but Jadzia leaned forward and deepened the kiss from an affectionate one into one of passion. It lasted only for a moment before they separated, still leaning their foreheads against one another.

"I have something for you." Jadzia finally spoke up, breaking the embrace and leading Lenara over to sit on the couch.

"A surprise?" Lenara asked with a knowing smile. "How did you ever manage to keep the secret?"

"I didn't." Jadzia replied. "I just told everyone I spoke to not tell you about it."

Lenara smiled. She knew the woman before her by now. Knew her habits, however strange the klingon ones were, she accepted them as another charming part of her Jadzia Dax. She knew her enough to know that keeping secrets was not her strong suite. Jadzia reached into her pocket and pulled out the small velvet box and Lenara gasped in response as it was laid in her hands.

"Open it." Jadzia said.

Lenara opened the box and what she saw took her breath away. It was a silver necklace with a diamond star hanging from it.

"Dax, where did you ever find this?" Lenara asked in awe as she removed the chain and its star carefully, setting the empty box down on the coffee table.

"I found it in Dahkur last month with Kira." Dax explained. "It reminded me of the Nobian star. Do you remember it?"

"Vividly." Lenara stated as she attached the silver chain around her neck.

"It's beautiful on you." Jadzia said earnestly.

"Thanks." Lenara replied with a genuine smile.

Jadzia leaned forward and met her in another kiss. It was a kiss of the world, a moment in the pristine clearness of space where time seemed to stop only for them. Lenara brought her arms up to wrap around Jadzia's neck as she pulled her closer. It was like there was no one else in the world except for them. It was a time for love and it was there's to have despite the consequences of any society or government. They were here, together. This was real, not a dream. Jadzia pulled Lenara closer and moved her lips from the mouth of her partner to her chin and neck. This was a night only the two of them could experience: their first experience together in the station. Truly, in both this lifetime and the last, love was the most beautiful feeling someone could have. It conquers all and brings stark military nations to their knees with a sigh. Amazing, that such a humbling feeling could belong to two individual souls.

It was there's to have and they would do with it what they pleased.

**Author's Note: **I wrote this because there are very few Jadzia and Lenara fanfics on and I just wanted to add my own twist on the story. Likes? Dislikes? Complaints? Questions? Please read and tell me what you like and what I can improve upon! I hope you all enjoy it! Thanks!


	2. The Anamoly

**Chapter Two: The Anomaly **

_**Year 2373**_

_**Deep Space Nine, The Alpha Quadrant **_

Jadzia Dax lazily cracked one eye open warily to a dark room barely lit with dim starlight through the windows. She turned to the computer time gauge that rested on the side of the bed and sighed tiredly as she caught sight of the hour. It was early morning. Oh, the joys of having a job which commands rising at 4:05 a.m!

Over the last few years, Lt. Commander Dax had become accustomed to waking at such a sharp hour, so much so that she had stopped using the computer's wakeup calls because she had conditioned herself to wake up on her own. Deep Space Nine's science commander now suddenly became aware of another warm presence beside her. Jadzia propped herself up on one elbow, leaning over her slumbering companion.

A simple smile came to her face as she watched Lenara sleep serenely. The faint starlight cast a ethereal glow to her skin and highlighted the fairness of her golden locks in a faint blue radiance. There was not a more peaceful sight to wake up to in all of the Alpha Quadrant. She felt she could just stay here forever like this, but alas…work beckoned. Jadzia sigh and rolled over out of bed as quietly as possible, careful not to wake the still sleeping beauty. She tiptoed to their bedroom door and began the tedious task of donning her daily uniform. Putting her hair up and straightening her uniform top, she was ready for action.

The hall was brightly lit as she stepped out into it passing by and nodding to other crew members on her way to the turbo lift. Jadzia reached the closed turbo doors and pushed the button for the platform to come up. She heard the sound of it rising and prepared her sleepy self for its arrival. The metallic doors opened and there was the Major, a smile forming on her face the moment she caught sight of the Trill commander.

"Good morning, Major." Jadzia greeted as she stepped onto the platform, to stand beside her.

"Good morning, Dax." Kira acknowledged, inclined her head to her, a smile threatening to sprout onto her face. "How was your dinner last night?"

"Good." Jadzia replied turning her head to face her friend, smiling characteristically. "Wonderful. How was yours?"

"Good." Kira replied. "Decent, for a night spent with crew schedules. Ija Beru was the highlight of the evening."

"I 'm glad." Jadzia said. "That you had someone to distract you from those crew schedules."

Kira grinned as they both stepped back for the doors to close. "To Ops."

------

Lenara woke up at around 7:00. She opened her eyes to greet the ever present starlight in the dimness of the room. It was hard to imagine a morning without the sun rising over the beautiful Tenaran landscape on Trill. One could see the radiant cornucopia of colors almost perfectly from the apartment window she used to have high above the streets in Trillius Prime. It was one of the things she missed the most after leaving Trill…that she would never see it again, it was an almost unbearable thought. But it was made survivable by the one person she would readily give it all up for and had given it up for in the end: Jadzia Dax.

Lenara rolled over and stretched contentedly beneath the satin sheets.

"Computer, tenement illumination to seventy percent." She ordered.

An artificial beep was her answer as the room became glorious with light. She reached out to the other side of the bed and found it cold, but familiarly empty. She was alone. Lenara sighed. Every morning without her was a trying morning, but Jadzia's job required that she be off to work at a very early hour. Perhaps, one morning she would wake herself up before Dax did and lay beside her, just enjoying the fact that she was there. Maybe, she would do that tomorrow.

She sat up and turned to let her bare feet hang over the edge of the bed. The floor was cold when she stepped down on it, but it was not a deterrent. She stopped as she passed by the full body mirror that hung on the wall. Her night gown hung loosely on her, comfortable just the way she liked it. Her golden-brown hair was loose and untamed at her shoulders. Lenara looked sharply at the reflection of her eyes in the insightful surface. They were green today…but tired from sleep.

Lenara smiled, but fleetingly. She had to get ready! She had to be to sickbay in one hour to analyze blood samples and like any active nurse, she had to look presentable for her patients. A glimpse of something in the mirror halted her in her rushing. The necklace Jadzia had given her the night previous lay reverently placed atop the dresser behind her and the diamond's brilliant radiance reflected its image in the mirror before her. Lenara turned around and reached out to grasp the necklace off of the dresser. Turning back to the mirror she held it up to her chest to see how it looked. Her reflection gazed awestricken back at her, at the glittering gem resting just below her collar bone.

For one moment she closed her eyes and allowed herself a genuine smile of true happiness. Slowly, she let her thoughts wander back to a time when they were in love and allowed to be so without the infringement of any law or crossing of any set boundary.

_It was a cold night in the capital city of Trillius Prime. A cold night, but clear as glass. The stars shone down on the city with not clouds hindering their path. A party was being held at the Ministry to celebrate_ _Phariain Roscar, the senior most member of the Ministry, honoring his more than one hundred years of service on Trill and a life's dedication to science. Nilani had been invited because__her father, Hilel, was a top researcher for the organization. She remembered almost everything she had felt that night. The awe at seeing the great hall. The pleasant delight when the minstrels had sung a version of 'Il Torio' as an interlude to diner. Even the growing nervousness she felt when her father pushed her out into the crowd after dinner to socialize and mingle. It was all alive and breathing in her. _

_The society gathering had been boring and predictable. People conversed in groups according to their class. Nilani was jostled and dragged into a group of researcher's daughters by her more extroverted sister, Nirvana. She had tried to keep up the banter with one of the researcher's son her sister had left her with, but it was becoming difficult. _

_The talk was all so mundane, over the same topics, the same worthless interests. _

_"I hear Consul Leviathan is working on a new plasma diffuser which is supposed to enhance the process without wasting energy." The researcher's son droned on, only pausing to take a sip of his punch and then continued. "Father says he won't ever be able to do it, not leastways, without the help of the research department, though Leviathan seems like the kind of man who would take a go at trying it alone first." _

_Nilani focused her attention back on him, though she had been bored almost to death by his words. "Yes, the Consul does seem like a rather stubborn man doesn't he?"_

_"Yes, or at least that's how father speaks of him." He went on. "However, I do not know him personally, but I trust in what father says."_

_"Everyone who believes what your father says, must have a great deal of patience, indeed." _

_Nilani heard a voice from somewhere and another boy appeared, about the same height as the former only sturdier built and more handsome. His eyes were of a striking blue which seemed to smile at her without the added help from the grin below as he directed his attention towards her. A kindred and free spirit lurched, longed to be free in those eyes. She recognized him as the boy she had met on the stairs at the start of the evening, though she had not asked him his name. Within a small moment he broke the eye contact between them both and turned back to his companion, clapping his shoulder with his hand again. _

_"Isn't that right,_ _Eudorus." The charming young man commented._

_"Go away, Torias, you're behaving like a child." Eudorus shook off the other's arm and indulged in his punch once more. _

_"Oh, Eudorus, don't be a bore." Torias said, his eyes glinting mischievously. "You simply need to focus all of your energy on getting more enjoyment out of life."_

_"I do enjoy life." Eudorus snapped. "Just not as you see it."_

_"Oh, please." Another boy rolled his eyes approaching them. Nilani recognized him as the boy her sister was fond of.__Nivrim Vos was his name, maybe. She couldn't remember for sure. "You enjoy your days like a fisherman relishes in the rotten smell and hot sweat of his work. You do it, but grudgingly."_

_"Is that so bad?" Eudorus shot back._

_"So bad?" Torias repeated. "It is a crime! Life is to be lived freely, there is nothing else for it."_

_Nivrim scanned the room for the one person he was looking for. Spotting, Nirvana, his smile grew and he grabbed Eudorus' arm startling him. _

_"What are you doing?" Eudorus asked. "Take your hands off me!"_

_"You want to see how life is to be lived." Nivrim nodded towards where Nirvana was talking with a group of other girls. "Then come with me and I will introduce you to real beauty." _

_"But I-" Eudorus protested._

_"No buts." Nivrim cut him off and began dragging him haphazardly across the room. "And no arguments either."_

_Torias grinned as he watched them go, then he turned to Nilani still smiling. She could only look at him. Her heart was beating a million miles a minute in her chest while every word she thought of seemed to get caught in her throat even before she had a chance to say it. Torias noticed her discomfort somewhat and took a step forward, extending his hand in the formal fashion to her._

_"May name is Torias Vosion." He begun the greeting, waiting for her to reciprocate. _

_Nilani swallowed the butterflies creping from her belly to her throat and struggled to speak clearly and normally. "I am Nilani Solan and my father is a researcher for the ministry."_

_"It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance miss." Torias brought her hand up and kissed the knuckles before letting it fall gracefully back to her side. "We met earlier at the staircase, but I did not have time to ask you your name."_

_"Me too." Nilani shook her head._

_Torias watched her, captivated by her. She was quiet and small, yes, but there was a strength to her all of her own. It shone brightest in the depths of those fiery green eyes and even as she smiled simply up at him, he felt the energy radiating from her. _

_"Now there is something new." She commented to herself watching him._

_"What?" He asked curiously._

_She looked up at him surprised as the hand holding the punch glass only inches away from her lips halted in mid air. Had she just thought out loud? And he heard it!_

_"Oh, nothing." She covered as she took a sip of punch and focused intently on the small crystal glass to shift her attention away from the fear building in her stomach or the heat rising in her cheeks._

_"Nothing is a thing for scholars to debate, but your thoughts are your own." Torias said. "But I am curious. What was the something new you spoke of?"_

_Nilani sighed and looked up at him, coaxed to truth by the memorizing character of those eyes. "It is just, the way you look at me. No one ever looks at me that way, as though they are searching for something they have finally found and you show an interest in what I actually have to say which is something very rare indeed." _

_"You must be joking?" Torias' grin faltered for a moment, but fell back into place without missing a step. "You're the most beautiful and interesting girl I've ever met. I can't imagine someone could ignore you, let alone choose to."_

_Nilani blushed, but did not shy away from him. "Thank You."_

_Torias smiled and turned to look back behind him to watch as Nivrim talked with Nirvana interestedly while Eudorus tried nervously to keep the attention of another girl. Torias turned back to her and nodded._

_"He's a smart boy, Eudorus is." Torias commented watching her. "He's fortunate to have you."_

_Nilani looked at him surprised. He didn't think…"No, he and I are just acquaintances. We met for the first time tonight." _

_"Oh, sorry." Torias shook his head at himself, chuckling a little. "I assumed and all too often my assumptions tend to get the better of me. Nivrim could tell you a whole bunch of stories about that."_

_Nilani giggled at that. "It is not the worst flaw you could fault yourself on."_

_"No, but it's the most reoccurring."_

_"At least you're honest." _

_"True, but honesty is not always forthcoming."_

_"No, but it is always real."_

_Torias smiled, his eyes blue eyes shining down on her. She would later come to recognize and to love those eyes even after years of separation, they would hold the same feelings of love and adoration for her as they had on their first meeting at the staircase of the Borisan Hall. The look in those eyes. Dax had fallen in love with her upon first glance without even knowing her name or anything about her and had trusted that love to the very end. Nothing, not even occasional discord brought that love under speculative light. It just always was, always felt right. It was unyielding, indefinable as the night of a full moon and ultimately unconditional with no end in sight. _

_Those eyes studied her thoughtfully for a moment. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of silence, Torias held out his hand to her and so trusting was she of him that she took it without any hesitation before he even had a chance to ask the question he was seeking. Torias had to chuckle slightly at this. "Come with me. There is something I would like to show you."_

_The two ventured out from the crowded hall and out onto the northernmost balcony where the moon was glistening like a great silver tear overhead. Wordless in the serene night, Torias led Nilani over to the railing and, taking one of her hands gently in his own, began pointing out various stars he knew and facts about them. As a precaution to steady her away from the low edge of the railing, Torias placed his opposite hand on the front of Nilani's waist and shortly after she brought up her other hand to cover his own almost unconsciously. An odd display for some, but then any common stranger would only be looking, not seeing. No one but the two of them could see what was between them, what separated the them both from the grand scheme of things as a whole and placed them in a world completely their own. It was almost a form of magic. _

_Lastly, their joined hands stopped at the base of one particular star in the sky, one who's light made all of the others they had previously examined seem somehow tiny and dim. _

_"What is this one called?" Nilani asked curiously._

_"My grandfather always referred to it as the Nobian star_. _According to his star charts it used to be the central star of the Nobian system, but after the main planet was destroyed it became a rogue without a charge to defend."_

_Nilani turned back to look at him as their eyes met. "I think I like the roguish type." _

_"Think so do you?" Torias asked leaning in a little closer to her._

_Nilani smirked and back out of his embrace slowly, puzzling the poor boy before reaching out her hand and taking hold of his smooth chin gently. "Perhaps, but thoughts are not necessarily sure things unless," and here she stopped and leaned in towards him again bringing their faces so close to one another that their noses almost touched, "unless we choose to make them so."_

_With that said, Torias closed the gap between them and the first kiss of the many to live on in eternity was ignited between the two. The sweetest of all first kisses was born that night and as evidence of its uniqueness, the Nobian star shined brighter in the sky over Trill that night than ever it has before or since in recorded history. _

Slowly, Lenara let the necklace slide down across her skin before she laid it back on the top of the armoire. She smile to herself and ran one hand over her abdomen where the symbiont was fluttering anxiously over the sudden revival of the memory. I had been so long ago, but still the feeling of that night lingered just as the tingle from the first touch of two pairs of lips did. The happiness which began that night resonated just as strongly today as it did then. Lenara could not think of anything more in the world she could ask for because everything she had ever longed for she found in Dax's love.

From nights spent reminiscing about old memories or nights spent making new ones. From mornings laying awake and just holding one another in the comforting embrace of each other's reassuring arms. From lunch hours occupied with the throwing back and fourth of playful yet eloquent banter. Or of the challenging days which were always the hardest to bear. Of the hours spent worrying over Dax when she was on away missions on the _Defiant_ or off escorting some diplomat from the Alpha quadrant. But since then had been together, Jadzia had tried her best to make sure her adoring wife would never have to be widowed again, not again, never again. Still, Commander Dax made it perfectly clear that whenever Deep Space Nine was in danger, she would be gladly willing to defend it, no matter what the cost. Lenara had accepted this, though with the announcement of every away mission it became a more and more difficult to acknowledge.

She often wondered what she would do if Dax would ever be taken away from her again. The notion would cross Lenara's mind often, but she did her best to push the thought away entirely. But still the threat lingered in the back of her consciousness every waking hour as a nightmare which would not dissipate from its plotted course.

Lenara sighed as she thought back to the fateful day she had been widowed. To the feeling of aloneness and dread she felt upon entering the empty house, knowing that her love was about to embark on a dangerous mission and she was powerless to stop it. She had tried to tell him about the risks the night before he left for the base, to convince him not to go, but he had said that she was overreacting and that he would perform the first successful test. He swore it would work and that he would be alright, she would see. And she had seen.

Lenara reached out for the corner of the armoire as grief and emptiness as she had only felt once before perforated her body from the abdomen, where the symbiont was shuddering in the aftermath of the memory, up all the way to her palpitating heart. She remembered the day a Starfleet officer in uniform came to her door. He was no older than her husband, younger even by a few years. A boy who had not yet earned his first stripes of service or seen more than a year of on task experience told her that the love of her life was gone. Oh, how her heart had broken in that one instant. She could still remember all of the sensations she had felt then: the pain of her breaking heart, the shock, the disbelief that such a thing could not be true, and the horrible reality that it was.

Lenara took a deep, shuddering breath as she stood up to her full height again. She had promised herself she would never endure such a thing again. Never.

"Infirmary to Dr. Kahn." The intercom voice suddenly beeped over her head.

"Dr. Kahn here, go ahead please."

"Dr. Kahn, Dr. Bashir is waiting in his office. He said you'd scheduled an appointment for-"

Oh, the appointment!!! She'd completely forgot about it.

"Yes, of course! Tell Dr. Bashir I'll be there in a few minutes. "

"Yes, Ma'am."

Lenara ran into the walk in closet, quickly threw on and over tunic and was out the door in a few short moments.

------

_**08:00 Hours**_

Ops was buzzing comfortably with status reports on everything ranging from the stasis of the main habitat ring to the tiniest fluctuation in subspace particles outside the station flooding in to be cataloged and checked, like normal. Every ensign and officer who had been assigned to the morning's first shift was on the bridge, seated at their consoles. The Captain was still asleep sound in his cabin as he did not have to be on call for another hour yet, so the only two senior officers on the bridge for the morning were Major Kira and Lt. Commander Dax.

"So you and Lenara enjoyed your anniversary last night, did you?" Kira asked smiling as she read the surrounding sensory report on the console in front of her.

"Oh, yes." Jadzia quipped looking up from her console. "The perfect romantic evening."

"Are you still both looking to start a family?" Kira asked scanning the each report that popped up onto the screen.

"Yes. I finally convinced her that I am not going anywhere anytime soon so it wouldn't be a burden to us just to try." Dax explained typing something into her console and accessing a whole other report to scan and read. In doing so she frowned to herself. "She still worries for me though."

Kira's smile fell a little. "I would too if I'd gone through what she's been through with you."

"I suppose I would too." Jadzia agreed. "I understand how she feels, but it makes me feel guilty every time I have to leave for an away mission."

"Maybe you should talk to her about it." Kira suggested looking over at her.

"We have talked about it." Jadzia confessed turning towards her. "And she insists that she's fine, but I can still see the worry in her eyes every time I'm called away."

"You can't blame her." Kira stated returning to her console.

"I don't." Dax reassured as she too resumed her work, finding it not so riveting as it was only a few moments ago. "And I never will. It was my fault in the first place, my impulsive drive that left her alone to suffer. I won't do it again to her, she doesn't deserve it."

"I didn't think you would." Kira said. "Still I am sure Lenara would feel better hearing you say it."

Jadzia leaned back in her chair, her hands still on the console as she thought back. Her eyes switching their focus from various places on the console as she became lost in memory.

_It was early one morning, hours before Dax herself had to be up for work. Jadzia awoke slowly, grudgingly succumbing to the yearnings of her body's natural alarm clock. Leisurely, she reached out across the bed expecting to encounter her partner's slender form and instead found only empty space. Puzzled, Dax sat up and gazed about in the dim light of their quarters. She scanned the room until her eyes fell upon the form of her companion. Lenara was standing before the bay window on the other side of their room gazing out into the expansive recesses of space as starlight illuminated her face and thinly clad body. _

_Dax smiled and took a moment to admire the sight, but the firm look of concentration on her love's face was enough to bring her back to reality._

_"What are you doing?" She asked quietly_

_Lenara's stern disposition disappeared into the beginnings of a contented smile as she turned to her. "Thinking."_

_"I can see that." Jadzia quipped her smile returning. Eloquently, she rolled out of bed and walked over to stand beside Lenara. Gently and with the utmost reverence for the divine creature whose presence she was blessed to be in, Dax reached down and traced her love's jaw bone down to where it met her chin and allowed her fingers to dwell there. "What were you thinking about, I wonder?"_

_Lenara leaned into the gentle touch, but did not allow herself to get lost in it. "Us."_

_Jadzia's smile slipped into a characteristic smirk she was prone to in her smart-aleck moments. "I love it when you're so specific. It makes trying to figure you out much easier on my mind."_

_Lenara allowed a small laugh to escape her lips. "Only for you, Dax."_

_"Aren't you sweet." Jadzia commented, her eyes glinting mischievously. _

_Slowly, Dax leaned down and lightly captured Lenara's lips in a chaste kiss, deepening it, once she knew her partner was comfortable, into a passionate dance. Lenara reached up and placed one hand at the back of Dax's neck, planting her in place, not that she'd mind you understand. Jadzia arms encircled Lenara's waist making her feel like a warm force field had surrounded her, keeping her safe against all odds. Time seemed to stretch out into eternity for the two of them as the peaceful exchange between the two ensued. There was nothing that could produce the same cosmic effect throughout the universe, but a lovers' embrace. Slowly, Jadzia pulled away, but allowed her forehead to rest against Lenara's as they stayed there for a few silent moments. _

_The spark in Lenara's eyes became curious as she watched Dax look at her. "What are you thinking now?"_

_Jadzia released a stout breath and smiled at her honestly, her arms still around her lover's waist. "I think I am seeing stars."_

_Lenara's smile became an expression of genuine happiness. "You're wonderful."_

_Jadzia's expression took on an air of the youthful playfulness she had never quite grown out of. "I know."_

_Dax stared down into her eyes as Lenara laughed lightly at her and the same warm feeling she was becoming more and more used too over the days of the past year reenergized itself throughout the tiny atoms of every fiber of her being. Finally, she felt truly complete. Never before in her life had she known this feeling with another person. With determined initiative, she said the words it had taken her only a few days to realize, but had issued in the happiest times of her life._

_"I love you, Lenara Kahn." She said._

_Lenara seemed caught off guard by the sudden admittance, but she smiled and leapt forward into Jadzia's embrace as she caught her in a tight hug. "I love you, Jadzia Dax."_

_"Nothing will ever take me from you, I swear it." Jadzia said, her heart in her throat as she stroked Lenara's back through the gold satin of her night shirt. "I promise."_

_"I know." Lenara said as she buried her face in Dax's shoulder. Slowly, though her good natured side emerged and she became determined to lighten the moment. "Oh, dear, what then shall I do on all of my day's off if we never shall part?"_

_Jadzia grinned into her hand and with a grunt picked her up off of the floor and held her completely in her arms. Lenara gasped as she felt her feet leave the floor beneath her. Carefully, she was brought over and deposited on to the bed with Jadzia landing atop of her supporting her weight with her elbows propped up on the mattress on either side of her. Playfully, Dax gazed down at her as their eyes met._

_"Well, I guess you're just stuck with me for good." Dax quipped. "And as a requirement I prescribe every waking hour you do not spend working must be spent with me, not allowing you to seclude yourself from the world."_

_"It's pretty well decided now is it?" Lenara arched one golden brown eyebrow up at her captor. _

_Jadzia nodded, the grin still in place. "Face it, we're bound to spend the rest of eternity together and I'm afraid I can't see any safe way out of it anytime soon." _

_Lenara leaned up and claimed Dax's mouth in another passionate kiss before pulling away abruptly. "I wouldn't have it any other way."_

_"Neither would I." Jadzia replied before she descended for another kiss, this one long, full of love and everything she wanted Lenara to know, but did not trust herself to express to her in words._

_The rest of their morning and even a little time spent after the alarm went off was theirs to have, to hold, and to keep together for as long as they both shall choose to. _

It had been a very pleasant morning, Dax remembered, one of her favorite to date, though she had to admit that she would not be adverse to trying to top the record.

"Dax!" Kira called punching in some controls on her console.

"What?" Dax asked startled, blown out of her daze.

"Come take a look at this." Kira asked.

Jadzia stood up and walked up to Kira's console, leaning over her shoulder to read the stats from the surrounding sensors array.

"I'm detecting a lot of electrical interference." Kira stated. "But the sensors can't seem to tell where it's coming from."

"Could be an unnatural influx of energy from the wormhole." Dax interjected.

"It's possible, I'm not ruling it out, I just can't see that as being the cause of it though." Kira commented.

The scientist in Jadzia frowned. She honestly couldn't come up with another reason for the unusual anomaly. Her natural instincts for such situations were off keel and she was sure it'd never happened to her before this morning.

The captain emerged from his quarters, in full uniform and ready for action. "Report, Major."

"High levels of electromagnetic interference in the perimeters just outside the wormhole." Kira resounded typing rapidly into her console.

"What is the source?" The Captain asked.

Kira shook her head. "There's too much interference. I'm not getting clear readings anymore."

"Sisko to O'Brien. Launch a probe into the anomaly."

Suddenly, a great shockwave of energy came from the perimeter of the wormhole and crashed into Deep Space Nine. Alarms began going off everywhere whilst steam was flooding into ops from two damaged conduits. As the steam flooded the room the crew members became lost from sight to one another. Jadzia had been knocked out of her chair from the initial jolt as had Kira. The station was shaking beneath her propelled by still more explosions in other parts of the station as Jadzia felt herself slam into the cold metal floor.

As the shuddering of the creaking structure came to cease and the debris slowly stopped falling around them, Jadzia tried slowly to sit up, but was forced back down as sharp pain shot like fire through her legs and up her spine. Carefully, she reached back one of her hands to feel the back of her neck. It was cold and numb. When she brought her hand back it was covered in warm scarlet liquid. But the blood did not hold her attention for long. She remembered the last time she had found herself bleeding and numb in such a situation.

_The shuttle gave a sudden forward reel. Torias began flipping through the status reports on his console as fast as he could, but it never hurt to have a second assessment. "Vos, status report." _

_"We're losing velocity! We've blown a power conduit!" Nivrim shouted a loud sound resonated from outside the shuttle. "It's cumulative!"_

_"We've lost stable altitude!" Torias yelled, as he tried to compensate with the forward thrusters, but the engines weren't answering. _

_"Engines two and four have exploded and the main plasma conduit to engine three is leaking!" Nivrim shouted as his hands began to fly feverishly over the controls._

_Torias slammed his fist down on the con button. "Dax to Standard control, mayday, mayday. We've lost two engines and the third is going fast!"_

_"Torias! If we enter the planet's atmosphere at this speed the shuttle will explode!" Nivrim shouted. _

_"We'll have to use the back thrusters to decrease speed!" Torias shouted already initiating the command on his console._

_Nivrim suddenly stopped. "But they're already compensating for the loss of altitude. If we use them to slow us down we'll burn them out!"_

_"Do you have a better suggestion!" Torias yelled. It wasn't a question._

_Nivrim shook his head. "Thirty seconds to atmosphere! Twenty! Fifteen! Ten! Five!"_

_The Athion gave a mighty lurch and power conduits were exploding all over the place from the extra external pressure, but regardless the smoking tin can made it through the atmosphere of planet Trill. Below them were the green woodlands of the north, the most beautiful of all natural regions on Trill, but on this day the trees looked like green spikes ready to spear through them._

_"Mayday, mayday!" Torias shouted into the com link, but it was static with interference. _

_"The thrusters are gone and engine three is on its last leg!" Nivrim yelled._

_"We'll have to try for a safe landing!" Torias shouted as another, smaller power conduit went out with a small explosion above his head. "Engine three is all we have."_

_The shuttle flew, not slowing as it neared the woodlands. The backend was smoking as it burned away and finally, not one hundred meters from the ground, engine three gave out. The nose of the shuttle dove through the trees haphazardly, igniting small fires on the desolated wood as it slide by at hundreds of miles per hour. One of the metal wings tore off completely as it hit a rocky outcrop. Finally, it stopped when the nose of the shuttle slammed into another rocky outcrop, bouncing over it from the force and coming to rest on the battered ground surface._

_The initial impact had jarred the pilots in their seats. For the first of the two, everything after the first impact was blurry and numb. An armor piece from the shuttle canopy had been jerked from its place as sparks of friction flew and in one solid minute of impact, it had fallen down and skewed the first pilot's seat, impaling itself through the right side of Torias's body. The second of the two test pilots had been thrown completely from his seat. His right arm lay beneath another piece of the craft's fallen steel armor and he was conscious, though pinned to the ground, he still struggled to free himself. _

_Torias felt numb as though he were on some sort of anesthetic that was designed to put him to sleep. Blue eyes registered the broken glass and burning console in front of him. His ears picked up the sounds of groaning from behind him. He tried to turn, but his body refused to move from the neck down. He did not know what was wrong with him, but his mind refused to function, refused to register what had hit him. He coughed as blood rushed into his right punctured lung. His head lulled from side to side finally settling limply back on his headrest staring straight ahead of him. His coughing became more violent as his body ceased to feel anything anymore. Breathing became more shallow, as blue eyes half closed. Dax's last thought was of his wife, his last sight of the broken glass of the front windshield and, then the world went dark one final time. One more inhale and a full exhale as the young Trill's body went mercifully limp, eyes still unfocusedly staring forward. _

_The rescue team didn't arrive from the Lunar Base for another hour. By the time Commander Tirgan and his men had peeled back the mutilated metal of the door, Commander Vos was almost delirious, his sight a red haze of dizzying reality and Commander Dax was long gone. _

Dax strained to pick herself up off of the ground. She heard some of the other crew members talking, their voices mumbled through the rush of steam.

Benjamin had been knocked over by a piece of debris and was just coming to stand up. "Major!"

Kira appeared leaning heavily on a burned out console, clutching her side where a thin stream of red liquid was escaping from in between her clamped fingers. "I'll be alright."

The Captain nodded, obviously concerned, but propelling himself to keep searching for the rest of his crew members. "Ensign Peters! Dax!"

Jadzia wanted to move towards them, but her legs and body refused to obey her wishes. She could feel pressure all over her body as though a great weight were pinning her to the floor, though as she looked around herself she could not see anything that could be so heavy as to restrain her to the floor.

One of the other crew members, one of the surviving ensigns perhaps, shouted over the steam. "Ensign Peters is dead, sir!"

The captain's face became grim. "Dax! Dax, can you hear me?!"

The steam began to dissipate in intensity and the air became clearer, but the alarms were still going off like crazy. Kira limped over to the only undamaged console she could find. "All systems are off line, Captain."

Benjamin smacked his com badge. "Sisko to O'Brien, can you hear me? O'Brien?!"

"All communications systems are off line including the com links." Kira interjected pushing in her already useless com link.

Jadzia felt the small area around her head begin to get cool and wet, as though the side of her face was floating on the surface of some lake. Her ears were picking up the sounds of the surrounding area, but her mind was focused on a time not anywhere remotely close to that place and time.

_"Why won't you listen to me?!"_

_"Because you're not making any sense! Look, I don't have a choice in this." _

_Angry tones and bitter feelings were replaced by tears and hopeless words. "Fine, go off and do your duty to Starfleet, go on pilot the Aithon, go on and get yourself killed."_

_"You're just overreacting! You worry too much for your own good. I'll be fine. What could happen?" Torias tried to reassure gesturing with his hands to himself as he spoke. _

_"Torias! You told me yourself that the system controls were worrying Commander Belair when he gave them the check up yesterday. And you ask what could go wrong?"_

_"Belair's head is screwed crooked on his shoulders. He would worry about the floor if just changed color beneath his feet. The man's a tight neck! He's so tense that he can barely manage to inhale air let alone ease up on a shuttle run."_

_"Torias you don't understand, how can you not understand."_

_"How can you keep bringing this up?! Nothing has happened to me so far, why are you so adamant that something will go wrong tomorrow?"_

_"I can feel it. Please…please don't leave me…I beg of you. Torias?" More tears came, these ones more of fear and panic than of frustration or anger. "Please, don't leave me." _

_Torias gazed at her, his gaze level and his face seemingly indifferent while his voice was calmer than the cool sheen of water over a steady surface of some winter lake ice. "You're getting yourself worked up for nothing. It won't happen like that, you'll see."_

Jadzia's eyes shot open as the memory faded from her. She felt cold to the touch, slicked over in a sheen of sweat. The steam had cleared and the crew members who were not incapacitated were moving about trying to figure out just what was happening. Dax could hear Benjamin's voice shouting orders, but could not understand the exact words he was saying because her ears were ringing in a strange monotone. Suddenly, Dax felt two arms help pick her up off of the ground and an order not to move from the medic who had pulled out his tricorder and was trying to assess the damage done to her system.

"An acute spinal fracture." The medic frowned and turned to his assistant. "She can't move herself. I need an anti-grav lift to transport her to the infirmary. Hurry, go!"

Major Kira leaned even heavier against the console station and her breathing became heavier. The medic moved from Dax across Ops to her and began analyzing her wound a little too personally. Kira slapped his hands away with one arm.

"A piece of falling debris sliced through my side." Kira informed him for his own diagnosis so he didn't have to touch her again. "It needs cauterization. You better hurry."

Her voice sank to a whisper as she fell backwards, still holding her side in a vice grip to try and stop the bleeding. The medical assistant returned with another assistant and a anti-grav lift following close behind them. They knelt down next to Dax who had lost enough blood now that she was drifting in and out of consciousness.

The first assistant reached for her shoulders. "Help me lift her up. Be careful."

They placed Dax on the stretcher and vacated the room just as repair teams were arriving to put out the electrical fires and tend to the wounded. A medic approached Kira, and this time she did not object as he helped to lift her off of the ground and place her arm over his shoulder. A nurse was using a cordial stimulator to heal a cut on the Captain's temple as he continued to give orders. Kira craned her head back around as she was being led away. On the main screen the wormhole flashed just as normally as it did at any given time of the day. The anomaly had vanished into obscurity just as quickly as it had shown up.

_**Author's Note: **_Oh, a mystery! I hope everyone enjoyed this piece, still, I would like to hear your thoughts. Leave me a review! Thanks!!


	3. When You're Broken

_"The only real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in Having New Eyes"_

-Marcel Proust-

**Chapter Three: When You're Broken…**

_**Year 2373**_

_**Deep Space Nine, the Alpha Quadrant**_

_**The Infirmary**_

_**08:00 Hours**_

Lenara sat in the infirmary watching Dr. Bashir intently as he studied the data laid out on his tricorder held in one hand while running the hand scanner over her skillfully with the other. Julian's dark eyebrows rose and arched a few times as he nodded his head at a few points. Lenara smiled to herself watching him in his work. He really was thorough .

"Did you find something of interest, Dr. Bashir?" She finally asked, a little nervous, but smiling outwardly to put on a brave face despite it. For the past week and a half she had waking up sick to her stomach and worse for ware the rest of the day because of it. She found that though she was able to push herself well beyond her limits in her work as she always had, that she became exhausted faster than usual.

Lenara had tried to hide it in the beginning, but Dax noticed anyway and suggested that she visit the doctor. The moment she had confessed her symptoms to her lover, she had seen a spark of excitement flare in those blue eyes before they filled with worry and she couldn't help wondering if it was what they both thought it might be.

"Not particularly. Blood pressure and hemoglobin levels are all well within the normal range." Julian mumbled to himself in diagnosis. "But wait a minute," he looked up from his tricorder, smiling at her in that confident way of his. "According to these readings you have two heartbeats. Congratulations, doctor."

Lenara nodded her head albeit shakily. In tandem she released the deep breath she had been holding.

"Would you rather I contact Dax right now?" Julian asked setting the hand scanner down on the tray by his side, "She did say to contact her right away when we finished the exam and this is an event of some significance, wouldn't you agree, Lenara?"

"Yes." Lenara said softly and as she did so her hand unconsciously traveled to her midsection, "but I would rather tell her on my own, a little later perhaps."

Julian raised a well sculpted eyebrow as a knowing smile crept up on his features.

"You see, I arranged to have lunch with her this afternoon and, if this physical turned out the way I thought it might, I had planned to tell her then."

It wouldn't be that big of a surprise. They had been planning and trying for months, after all this was just the first attempt to take. It was scarce knowledge that two joined Trill could conceive children with one another with the bonding of their symbionts in the process of love making. Not a physical joining, but an emotional, mental, and soulful connection which resonated along with the bodies of their hosts as well. It was a hard thing to achieve, but once it culminated it could sometimes conclude with the conception of a child with traits close to that of their parents or a mixture of both equally. Generally, this reaction happened with every joined Trill couple, regardless of their gender. So according to those rules, should Dax and Lenara have a child together, it would most likely be a daughter with a mixture of each of their physical traits and mental capacities just as would any other normal girl. What a child.

"So you're just going to make her wait, are you? So cruel." Julian stood and walked over to enter the data he had accumulated on his tricorder into the station's medial database without missing a beat. "You know how Jadzia will take to that."

"Yes, I know, but she was always a fan of spontaneity. I am sure she can handle it."

Julian allowed himself a good natured laugh, "I have no doubt she can."

The doctor returned his full attention to his console and Lenara's thoughts turned back to the days beforehand. They had talked well into the beginning about possibly starting a family. Having children had never been a top priority in Lenara's life, with her career taking the top slot, but Dax changed things. With Jadzia, waking up next to her every morning, falling asleep beside her every night and just reveling in the simple pleasure of their time together; she had begun to think of things which would have never otherwise crossed her mind.

She began to think of the future not in terms of science, but of fulfillment. Not in the manner of what she wanted for herself, but in what she wanted for them and in how reaching those goals would make them feel. She thought in terms of not herself, but of them. Lenara had come to realize that their life together was all she thought about and it scared her a little. Everything was going so well…too well.

It had for the most part in her life remained stable from the beginning to the point she was at now. Though things had not always been so enjoyable.

The College of Science and Technology was the largest and most renowned on the Trill home world. It is known that eighty percent of all freshmen drum out their first year, but that fact did not deter Lenara from entering the Intermediate Sciences program and aspiring to excel. From a spectator point of view, it didn't seem that far fetched. Lenara's father, Daman Ortner, was one of the heads of the Science Council and her maternal uncle was a scientist who worked on one of Trill's moons so it seemed only natural that Lenara tread her heels in one of the sciences.

There really were no other acceptable opportunities. Even her older brother, Nejan, was off working with a research team on the Deja II colony, but a prestigious name wasn't enough to garner success. You had to uphold that name. Still, someone with Lenara's family background was expected to try and therein lay the point. Thankfully, for the young Trillian woman, that she loved science.

There were many formalities to separate the worthy from the unqualified when it came to the admission College's admission process. Being accepted by the merit of one's application wasn't enough. You also had to pass a series of entrance exams in various subjects. These were known as Competency Exams and they weeded out the "best and brightest" from simply the "ordinary" (though it was rumored that some students who scored a ninety or better average on all of their entrance exams were still turned away).

It came closer and closer to the day when Lenara would have to take her own exams and to tell the truth, she was frazzled with nerves. She studied day and night and slept sparingly. Neither one of her parents disturbed her much, each knowing the supreme importance of studying for these tests and the weight they would hold over their only daughter's future career. They had assigned it to be Bajal's job to bring dinner up to his sister in her room, even though she barely touched it, she was so engrossed in her work, but Bajal too was stubborn. He would sit on the edge of her desk and bemoan her until she finally relented and took a break to eat. Younger brothers were always good for that much.

It was on one of these strenuous days when she when the first known turning point in her life began. When a moment of true clarity had allowed her to notice more about herself or her future than anything else had since.

Lenara closed her eyes and momentarily removed herself from the room. She was no longer in the infirmary. She was far away, in another place, another time.

_A knock came briefly at her bedroom door, but Lenara did not look up from her desk._

_"Enter."_

_"Are you still taking notes?" Bajal complained as he walked in carrying a tray of soup and rolls in and setting it on the side of the desk. "You know, there is such a thing as too much studying."_

_Lenara allowed herself a brief smile, but only for a moment, "Not for these exams."_

_"You know, you say that, but Gaia Versan made it into the College of Science and Technology and I can remember seeing her out with Tan and Verve almost every night." Bajal interjected, wanting to be right, but not to make his sister angry at him. He and Lenara were almost always on good terms and he preferred to keep it that way for as long as possible if he could. _

_"For good reason too." Lenara finally looked up at him, her eyes a light silvery green-blue in the afternoon light, "Gaia's grandfather is the Dean."_

_Bajal began massaging the back of his neck with his hand, a relaxing gesture he had picked up from their older brother which became more of a distraction to him than a comfort in times of pure nervousness. "I forgot about that. You really should take a break though. I like cramming as much as any student, but what you are doing at the present is not healthy."_

_"So you say, little brother, but you don't know the caliber of these tests." Lenara emphasized her point by strengthening her voice when she stated the words, "These exams are important. They determine what I am to do with my life and if I can garner the career I need to have."_

_Bajal lowered his eyes to one of the bronze paper weights on the black enamel desktop. When he spoke his tone was quiet, defeated, belittling his words. "You don't need it."_

_"Bajal." Lenara reprimanded her brother lightly, knowing that on this one subject he couldn't be humored, "You know as well as I do that's not the truth. This is one matter that you and I have very little choice in."_

_"Yes, but our careers, no matter how much we may wish to make them seem as such are not our lives, Lenara. You must be able to separate yourself from your work or else none of it matters. The last thing I would want to do would be to look back on my life and be disappointed."_

_Lenara released a long drawn out breath in one exasperated sigh. She was divided. On one side she knew what her brother knew. She understood what they all wanted to feel, that they really did have a choice in their lives, but the other side of her was more practical. The other side knew from both experience and knowledge of the history of their people that this was not the case._

_Trill was a world founded on the nature of science and only the most prestigious families who ranked highly in their society, and had been on the top for many generations, were scientists; but still others aspired to be. If ever there was a social climber who wanted to be at the top, all they need do would be to set their goals aloft, but the reality of it all was that so often their goals were too high even for the hands who put them there to grab hold of again. It meant a lot to be the best, to be counted in the top. _

_Bejal just couldn't understand, he was too young still yet. _

_"You just don't understand, Bajal." Lenara said sitting back._

_"What is there to understand? I know that society confines, but physically we still have the right to choose. Don't we?" Bajal added the last bit as a hopeful whisper as if he knew better, but was still hoping for the best anyway._

_Lenara shook her head, "Please, Bajal. I'm tired and there is still a lot I have to get done before dinner tonight."_

_"Just make sure you eat dinner tonight." Bajal scolded lightheartedly, moving away from the touché subject they had been discussing, "I don't want to come back tonight and see that you've wasted away to nothing."_

_Lenara smiled, relieved at the new air of levity which had settled between them, "I will."_

_She heard the electronic door close on its own behind him and then she was left to reconcile with the silence. _

Lenara's thumb abstractly stroked over her abdomen through the satin of her dress. She remembered the afternoon after she had finished the test, the emptiness she had felt leaving the college grounds and realizing that there was almost nothing that she particularly wanted to do. She had been preparing for weeks for these exams. With them gone she had no immediate goals to work towards and no ambition to do anything, but too much left over adrenaline in her system to be able to just step back, take a deep breath and relax. She had wandered the gardens behind the Merkt Building, taking aesthetic pleasure in the classic architecture and flawlessly sculptures of figures from the Scientific Revolution on Trill. All of it was a far cry back to a different time. A time that those on the council thought was more esteemed than the present. Quite an impression to be giving to the upcoming generation, that they would never be as good as those who came before them.

_Lenara had decided to take a walk on the paths leading through the main square. The bronze buildings and sleek silver sculptures gleamed in the beams of sunlight coming down from above, creating a rainbow prism effect right from the onset when eyes first took in their first sight of the place. Statues of various council members from all centuries were strewn about the lush green landscape. There were a few unforgettable ones._

_Verad Kereve, the man who first introduced standard replicator technology to the Trill system, was an aged silver figure clad in a style of council robes long ago discarded. The statue of the famed __Phariain Roscar was equally glorified and adorned with the same embellished decorative marks of age. __Each and every stationary figure had their facial expressions set in the same stern, contemplative matter and their bodies were all of the same build. Even then, Lenara doubted that every single man whom the statues modeled looked exactly as they were presented with heavy brows and muscular arms despite their intellectual merit. They were presented as the ideal form of what they were envisioned as, not of what they themselves had been. They were what they were without her so Lenara walked on._

_She came to the center fountain, flanked loosely in a protective ring by landscaped arrangements of planted flowers in various shades of vivid blues, purples, reds, burgundies and golds. There were a few rocks situated meaningfully on within the pockets of plants to give a somewhat ambiguous barrier between the frivolously flowing colors and the green which sprang up from the shadows below. _

_It was such a serene place in such an old and, at times, traditionally severe city. The perfect sort of place to offset the melancholy which had over taken her._

_The surface of one of the rocks was scrolled with a bunch of letters, but the rock face was turned away from her at an angle so she couldn't read it clearly through the glare from the sun. Lenara began taking a few steps to the side so she could read the inscription, but then she caught sight of another in the garden and stopped dead in her tracks. She was used to being the only person when she came to gardens like this to be alone and think about things in her life. It made her feel somewhat self conscious to have someone else there even though the area was large enough to spaciously hold fifty such people without one of those people having to be more than a bench's length closer to her. _

_The other was also a girl who looked about her age and just as shy. Dark auburn hair which shone with a reddish sheen to it in the afternoon sunlight was tied back into a loose pony tail with a trademark red ribbon. Her skin was slightly sun-kissed from days spent playing out in the summer sun, a stark contrast to Lenara's own light pallor. The girl had only just emerged from the grove of Gionnacca trees when she was joined in the clearing with another two children. One another girl, was older and seemed more refined for her age. The second was a boy, who was younger than both of his sisters and whom shared the same dark hair. _

_The boy had a sonic boomerang and with practiced grace, he threw the electronic contraption into the air and it sang as it flew away from him. He raced after it and stopped near the trunk of a large tree where he caught it skillfully and then turned with a smug smile to his older sisters. The eldest of the two shook her head while the younger reflected her brother's smirk, but she soon took on a bashful flush to her cheeks as her older sister turned towards her._

_"Azel you know better." The older girl turned back to the boy, holding a silken shawl firmly to her bare shoulders to shield her lighter skin from the brazen summer heat. "Father wouldn't like it if you were hurt and mother, can you believe how angry she would be if we had to come home and tell her that you had injured yourself playing with that hazardous thing?"_

_Azel waved away his older sister's comments as one would swat at a fly buzzing tediously around their head. _

_The elder's eyes narrowed and she sighed in frustration, her scrunching up to show her evident anger at her younger sibling. "I hope that thing veers backwards and smacks you in the head, hard! Maybe then you'll learn not to argue with my superior wisdom."_

_Azel's expression scrunched up in turn and he stuck out his tongue in stubborn defiance while his other sister smiled indulgently at the all too common argument igniting between the two. Even though she had remained completely silent throughout the whole ordeal, Lenara noticed the quiet sister and paid more attention to her behavior despite her shyness. Perhaps it was something in the clarity of those blue eyes. Something which made her want to get to know the other a little better. _

_"You wish, Eilian!" the little boy stuck out his tongue one more time for good measure and then bounded off to a safe distance with his new toy. _

_Eilian opened her mouth, but no calculated retort followed the empty action and she instead stood there for another moment longer and scowled. Then she reconsidered and marched off, stopping mid-stride to pause and wait for her sister, "Come along, Jadzia."_

_The two sisters walked around the pathways which stretched in a geometrical diamond space across a wide expanse of the park, their shoe soles scuffing against the pavement lightly as they went. They were both vaguely aware of their brother and his toy buzzing around him, Eilian more than Jadzia as her more mother-like status in the group perpetuated her more vigilant demeanor in these situations._

_Azel ran as fast as his stringy long legs would steadily carry him, his arms outstretched in their usual wingspan as he imitated the advanced toy as it soared in mid-flight. The boy appeared happy, but he only knew the shadow of happiness. The reflection of the feeling most people spend their entire lives searching for. Being a child, the actual sensation which created the reflection was closer to him then than it was to most adults in their prime. He knew what it felt like to have the wind caress his face as his arms floated freely through the air, he knew the experience which was attainable to him, but he would never know what it meant to soar through the clouds above him. Would never know the wisps of white as they caressed the baby fuzz still on his boyish cheeks. Still, half and experience and better than none at all. The dream of actual flight was still there nonetheless and the unknown is what spurred the existence of an experience._

_Jadzia smiled as she saw her brother close his eyes as he leapt up and caught the boomerang in his hand and hopped down. _

_"He seems happy." She commented quietly. _

_"More so than usual." Eilian observed with a critical eye._

_"Suspicious of him are you?" Jadzia quipped seeing her sister's obviously disapproving expression._

_"No, just observant." Eilian stated watching as the boomerang flew into the tree line and after a suspenseful pause rebounded back out of the obscure green canopy, narrowly missing his shoulder. "Azel, be more careful!"_

_"He's just a boy. How careful were you the first time we snuck out of our house after dark and forded the Abureck Woods pretending we were explorers?" Jadzia asked leaning closer to her. _

_Eilian turned on her, "That was long before Azel was even born."_

_"Exactly." _

_Eilian shook her head dismissively, "That makes no sense."_

_"Why do you do that?" Jadzia asked quietly. _

_"What?" Eilian was entirely obtuse. _

_"Why do you always dismiss everything I say?" Jadzia asked quietly, subtly hurt._

_"What are you talking about, Jadzia?" Eilian questioned becoming frustrated right away._

_"Why is everything you say always right and everything I say always wrong?"_

_Eilian snorted and turned away from her sister to regard a ring of burgundy flowers encircling one of the fruit bearing trees., "This is the type of thing I would expect coming from Azel not you. Seriously, you need to stop your whining and act your age, Jadzia."_

_"Jadzia?"_

_She was slightly miffed when she did not receive a response and turned around only to find her sister gone. "Jadzia? Well where could she have disappeared to?" Her attention shifted just then from her lost sister to her brother when she caught sight of him almost stumble into the trunk of a tree struggling to capture the boomerang again, "Azel! What were you thinking? Azel!"_

_Lenara encircled the fountain again, observing the colorful flower arrangements adorning the landscaped perimeter. She had decided a few moments ago that it was not her place to observe others as though she was spying. Their business, though as interesting as it was to her, was none of hers to know. She knew better (as she was constantly repeating in her mind as her eyes darted and yearned for just one more look). Besides, it was only proper to take note of the surroundings, not of the surrounding people. She came to settle beside the rock with its scrawled inscription. _

_Nimbly, Lenara knelt down beside the stone and brushed aside the leaves of a fern hiding the first few words of the quote from view. _

_From left to right it read:_

_Three-quarters of the sicknesses of intelligent people come from their intelligence. They need at least a doctor who can understand this sickness._

_Lenara leaned back on her arm, a small smile playing on her lips. "Whomever wrote that struck upon a real cord within our society."_

_She reclined on her haunches comfortably in the short grass. It really was a beautiful day. The wide blue expanse floating in a sea of Endless Skies above their heads was as clear as the reflection off of any ocean. The sun was equally as bright, having emerged well into the late afternoon without any clouds to hinder it from its natural path. _

_The day was calm and silent-_

_"Ow!" _

_Well, practically silent. What on all of Trill was that? Lenara openly wondered as she sat up a little straighter and listened more carefully. _

_"Ouch! Aw, it figures."_

_Lenara stood and followed the disgruntled voice just around the bend until she was on the other side of the fountain. The blue eyed girl she had seen across the yard earlier was sitting in one of the squares of flowers uneasily and from Lenara's personal guess, she must have fallen there. The knee of her pants which matched the same hue as her dark purple tunic was ripped and a jagged line of red was beginning to form under the broken material. The girl sighed disheartened one more time before she straightened out her injured leg, shifted all of her weight to the other and leapt into a crouching position from which she would be able to stand up easier. But the movement was too swift and the world in front of her eyes began to spin for a moment, before she fell back into her previous sitting position. _

_Jadzia was more than willing to try it again when she was pushed gently back down by two hands on her shoulders. _

_"Perhaps it would be wise to wait before trying something like that again." _

_Jadzia looked up into a pair of vibrant bluish-green, almost teal eyes. The same pair she would spend the rest of her life getting lost in, though at the moment neither one of them really could have known._

_"I wouldn't try that again so quickly." Lenara comforted the younger girl. "Take a moment to regather your strength and then we can try it again."_

_"We?" _

_Lenara knelt comfortably down next to the other, her attention focused completely on Jadzia's injured knee. She looked up with a joking smile on her face, "What did you do to yourself?"_

_Jadzia returned the humor. "Who do you think you are my sister?"_

_Lenara's expression became more serious, but still held the shadow of its former smile. "What really did happen?"_

_"I was walking through here and I turned my ankle on that rock and cut it on the one across from it." Jadzia easily explained. _

_"Looks like you might need stitches." Lenara thought out loud as she examined the deep cut._

_"Surely its not all that bad, Doctor?" Jadzia kidded with a confidence she rarely felt and a mellow sense of humor she seldom indulged. For some reason, this girl was different than her schoolmates who criticized her or the rowdy children who populated her neighborhood, she was easier to confide to. Never before had Jadzia felt truly herself in another's presence. _

_Lenara chewed her bottom lip in calculated thought, "Perhaps not, but you should still have it checked out by a physician…did you just call me Doctor?"_

_Jadzia smiled easily. "Isn't that what you are?" _

_Lenara's expression warmed at the hidden laughter and mirth she could see in those calm blue eyes, "not yet."_

_Jadzia cleared her throat and held out her hand which Lenara accepted without much thought, "Let me introduce myself. I am -"_

_"Jadzia! Where have you been?" Eilian appeared suddenly behind Lenara, pushing her gently aside as she approached her younger sibling worriedly after catching sight of the wound, "what did you do to your knee?"_

_"It's nothing." Jadzia tried to wave it off even though it was beginning to twinge a bit. When her sister gave her a stern look which showed that she was not convinced, Jadzia continued again, "really."_

_As if to emphasize her point, Jadzia attempted to stand and almost landed back on the ground, but was steadied with Lenara on one side of her and her sister on the other. Jadzia turned just enough to meet her sister's serious eyes and also recognized the same shadow of concern in the eyes of the stranger who had helped her. _

_"I'm fine." Jadzia restated, "I just got up too fast, that's all."_

_Eilian looked unconvinced and turned to Lenara as if realizing her presence for the first time. "Who are you dear?"_

_Lenara opened her mouth, but no words came out. Just as she was quickly putting together a meek response, Jadzia interceded on her behalf._

_"She's a friend from school." Jadzia lied, knowing her sister's over protectiveness when it came to her siblings and was trying to shield Lenara from it, "who just happened to be in the park on the very same day. After I separated from you, I found her and we have been talking ever since. I was just clumsy enough to disregard my surroundings enough to trip and cut myself on a few stones that's all."_

_Eilian didn't look like she believed the little lie, but the determination to shield the stranger in Jadzia's eyes told her that now was not the time and place to discuss it. _

_"Oh, well thank you, Miss." Eilian said, "but I can take care of my sister from here. Come along, Jadzia."_

_As she slung her arm over her sister's shoulder and leaned her weight partially on her, Jadzia looked back and her eyes connected with Lenara's, "You'll make a fine doctor some day."_

_Lenara was speechless as Jadzia and her siblings vacated the park and that was the first time she had ever laid eyes on Jadzia Dax. _

Lenara took a deep breath and held out her free arm to brace herself so she would lean upon it for added support. It was a fateful meeting, much as it had been for Dax and Kahn when their previous hosts met at the society party all of those years ago.

She knew they could never be the same as Torias and Nilani. They were different people now, but they equally knew that a new future awaited them here and this baby was the proof of that. How they had gotten to this point in their lives didn't matter so much. What they were, what they had been…it was a thing a much younger version of herself would be concerned with, but it was unimportant.

A child. A representation of everything. Of their love and of their life together on the station. Of moments, the shortest, rarest, most unrecalled times of everyday which makes up the years of their lives. Of what was to come or…of what might not. The unknown, it was life to be lived.

Suddenly, the room shook violently as the station shuddered on it's axis. The electricity cut, sparks flew from unseen sources. Lenara screamed and everything was cast into blackness.

------

_**08:30 Hours**_

_**The Turbolift**_

The power had gone down and the turbolift was black. It had locked itself into the shaft automatically so there was no real risk of them plummeting down to the bottom. The real challenge was trying to get it moving again. The two medics had ushered all the wounded they could fit from Ops into the tiny shaft. The number of people in the shaft included the two medics, Major Kira holding her side, an ensign with a nasty burn to his shoulder, and Lt. Commander Dax laid out on the anti-gravity lift.

It was getting cold. The internal thermal regulators were off line and so the temperature, not just in the shaft, but every where on the station was dropping. Dax, though unconscious, shivered once as her sweat coated skin felt the approaching chill. Had she been awake, the medic watching over her was sure that the commanding science officer would have probably been quite grateful for her wool uniform. They had managed to put a pressure bandage on the wound and though the blood flow had been slowed, they could not stop the bleeding nor could they immediately do anything about the spinal fracture. The grim facts worried Nelson, the medic who was even currently monitoring her vital signs with a tricorder.

His sandy blond brow furrowed in the darkness, the only light coming from the tricorder's screen. "Her blood pressure is dropping and her isoboramine levels are only at fifty-five percent and falling."

"Damn." The other medic tending to the burned ensign in the corner cursed to himself, "we'll never get out of here before it drops to forty."

Kira smiled bitterly to herself in the gloom, dealing simultaneously with the lightheadedness stemming from loss of blood. "Don't be such an optimist, medic."

The other medic moved over to her adjusting the pressure bandage Kira was holding there. It had tempered the blood flow, but not stopped it entirely. "This is no time for jokes, Major. If you lose anymore blood you'll lose consciousness soon."

Kira grunted and adjusted her grip on the gauze patch quickly becoming slippery in her grasp, "I've been through worse. You Starfleet doctors are too textbook."

The Major smiled to put both her own and the young man's worried mind at ease, but the gesture had little of the desired affect on either parties as she reeled back and grimaced, feeling herself growing weaker by the minute. Her grip loosened on her side and the last thing she saw before the total darkness took over was the medic reaching out for her.

"Major!" Mitsuo Sulu called as he shook her shoulder and then once more in a fevered attempt to try and wake her. Resolute that he could not revive her safely without another 5 CCs of Hyprozine from the Infirmary, he turned to Nelson, "she's out cold."

Nelson moved his hand to the tranquil Trill's forehead as she shivered again against the cold. "Her fever is getting worse. We better pray the people in Ops can get the power up and running soon or else we might not be able to save them. Their conditions are too severe…" He let out a heavy breath as he opened his tricorder and checked the Science officer's stats again, "I don't know what else we can do for them if something doesn't happen soon. We don't have the adequate supplies here to help them."

Sulu pressed his hands to Kira's side in an effort to reinforce the pressure bandage. "If only we had a thermal regenerator, then we could take care of these wounds in no time."

Nelson shifted his attention from his tricorder to the wounded ensign in the corner as he heard him groan, "So much for 'the marvels of modern medicine being at our disposal at all times'."

"This is no time for your jokes, Edmund." Sulu refastened the straps firmly on the pressure bandage and sighed in relief as the falling bands on his tricorder screen told him the bleeding at Kira's side had largely subsided. "This is serious."

"I know it is, but my sarcasm is better than the urge I feel at the moment to snap at someone, mainly you." Nelson said holding the tricorder steady over Dax again, " her isoboramine levels have dropped to fifty. It's getting dangerous."

"That's not all." Sulu's voice sounded far away.

Edmund slammed his tricorder shut and turned around. In the bleakness of the tin box-like arena they inhabited, he could see Sulu standing facing the wall, his body stretched thin against the metal as one hand felt over the still vent a hair's breath below the ceiling.

"What are you doing?"

Sulu dropped down and relaxed his posture even though he felt anything but relaxed, "there is no air going through the vent. The ventilation shaft must be blocked with debris."

Nelson slammed his fist into an invisible target in the air and kicked a small piece of Plexiglas across the floor beneath the anti-gravity lift, "Well, that's that! We're all done for now."

"Why do you have to be such an optimist?" Sulu sank to the floor into a sitting position beside Kira, relaxing his posture as he did so. "We might as well relax. We'll waste more air our patients could be using if we continue overreacting."

Nelson's nostrils flared and his eyes blazed with fire like that which would spark at the end of a cannon, bespeaking the air of a man who was of more use in a command position than sitting behind a desk and analyzing blood samples.

"Overreacting?!" He shouted, his stout voice echoing in the small space. "We're libel to suffocate at any given moment within the next few hours and these patients are all going to die. I feel like a helpless bystander instead of the medic I am!"

Nelson let out an exasperated sigh and fell back heavily against the wall, sliding down the floor across from Sulu. Mitsuo studied Nelson's defeated posture as the other slumped against the opposite wall. He replayed the events of the previous hour through his mind. Nelson had reacted well under pressure and smartly with all of the trademarks of a good surgeon, but his demeanor was that in stature of a command officer. Briefly, Sulu wondered what had possessed Edmund Nelson to become a Starfleet medic instead of a captain or engineer.

"Just out of curiosity, what on Earth possessed you to enter Starfleet Medical instead of a command position?" Mitsuo asked raising one eyebrow.

Nelson smiled bitterly, "My father the brilliant physician."

"Ah." Sulu nodded his head, "I know a little about family pressure myself. I come from a long line of Starfleet officers, but I asked to join Starfleet, I wasn't forced."

"Lucky you." Edmund's smile disappeared. "My family originally held high status in the Navy with a legacy of good Admirals, but then came my great-grandfather the doctor and since then every man in my family has lead an exemplary career as a doctor in Starfleet. I was expected to follow suite."

"It is a noble pursuit." The young Sulu tried to reassure him, "the pursuit of medicine."

"I suppose so." Nelson leaned back, closing his eyes. He was trying to relax his body enough so as to not use up much more of the precious air in the tiny shaft, "it leaves precious little in the way of personal choice." The dark haired young man chuckled, the bitter laughter rumbling deeply in his chest. "You know one of my great ancestors was an Admiral in the Royal Navy. He was a great hero who stood tall and proud through cannon fire and here I am sitting in defeat in a dank and murky turbolift. Hardly the life of adventure I dreamed of when I was a boy."

"Not true." Sulu commented with a bitter smile. "You're that much closer to death."

Edmund laughed out loud this time at the morbid joke. It was the most humor either one of them could muster in the grim situation they had found themselves in. Strange, just this morning they had both been on their separate decks preparing for duty in their separate medical stations and though they had met at orientation; neither man could pretend to know the other all that well before this encounter.

Sulu chuckled to himself, "nice to know first impressions mean something."

Jadzia groaned and both medics shot bolt upright. Edmund hovered over her with his tricorder. The Trill science officer glowed with streams of perspiration and her breathing had become more labored.

Nelson's expression set in a calculated frown, "Her isoboramine levels have dropped again. They've fallen to 45 percent now. If only she could hold out until we can find a way to get the power up and running again."

Sulu stood, "What about going up the shaft and through one of the Jeffrey's tubes? Most of the doors open manually so I think I could do it without much trouble."

"No, don't be a fool. If you hurt yourself, I might not be able to get to you in time to help you." Edmund unbuttoned the coat of his uniform and slid the long sleeve wool jacket which would only hinder him further, off of his shoulders. "I'll go. We can't both go and she's my patient. If I can make it to the infirmary maybe I can get back here with some more supplies or something."

"Are you sure, if you get caught up-"

"She's my patient!" Edmund shouted rolling up his sleeves. "I am responsible for what happens to her and I'll be damned if I'll let anything happen to her. A little risk to me is nothing just as long as she survives."

"I'm beginning to understand why you're father wanted you to become a medic." Sulu murmured as he helped his comrade up into the opening through the ceiling above their heads, "it might not just have been for family pride after all."

------

When the first wave receded and the dust began to settle, Lenara whom had been practically jarred from her sitting position on the examination table, began to reorient herself from her place on the floor. Even though the air had cleared some, clouds of grey dust still hung everywhere, making it difficult to breathe. She was able to turn her head enough to see the doctor regaining consciousness while slumped up against the console he had been working on.

Julian Bashir groaned and propped himself up against the slippery touch sensitive glass covering the console. A growing stain of red was growing beneath the sleeves of one of his uniformed arms, but he ignored it and smacked at his combadge.

"Bashir to Ops."

His only reply was empty static. He stumbled over to Lenara, tricorder and hand scanner once again at his disposal and proceeded to quickly check her for injuries. "We've lost communications."

Satisfied that he had found no injuries on her to speak of, Julian pulled Lenara safely up with him when he stood. There was a few wires hanging from the ceiling and fallen scraps of metal in the way of debris laying on the floor which they had to sidestep around to avoid injury. Julian was worried most about the damage on other decks and who might have been mortally or even fatally wounded by the falling debris, but without a way to beam the injured directly to the infirmary and communications down there was just no way he could know how many had been wounded. There was a small medical station, much like a clinic on every level where the E.M.T.s and medical assistants lived and took up their posts. In those areas he knew the people with minor injuries would be well taken care of, but what about the other areas of the station? What about the more seriously wounded?

What about in Ops? What about Kira and Dax and the Captain? Julian shook his head. God forbid anything should happen to Dax at a time like this. The good doctor managed to get them out of harms way, ushering Lenara to sit beneath the examination table as he ran out through the still mildly falling debris. He tried to open the infirmary door using the main controls, but it was jammed so he opened the box and pulled down on the lever inside. The door gave a lurch and opened a fraction, just enough so that his thin body could slip through.

He emerged into an environment filled with clouds of steam, broken plasma conduits, and hazardously falling sparks. The ceiling sizzled above his head and he shrank sideways nearest the wall, drawing his head and shoulders together to minimize damage to himself by anything which could strike him from above. Julian cringed in the freezing corridor. He wasn't going to achieve anything if all he did was going to do was stick close to the wall and stay safe. What about the people in Ops? There could be wounded people bleeding somewhere on this level and others where help couldn't reach them? He had to do something. He couldn't just leave things the way they were without at least trying to help.

Steeling himself, he pushed off from the wall and rushed through the hall just as the ceiling behind him let loose a torrent of deadly debris. He stopped and turned disbelievingly to the destruction left in his wake. Had he not moved that debris would have crushed him where he cowered. Perhaps, every choice and action did come into being for a reason after all.

In the immediately following silence which seemed to engulf the suddenly still area, he heard an abstract sound resonating from beneath the metal plating on the wall. Julian reached out and began feverishly feeling along the wall until one hand grasped a handle. He pulled back on it, but the door did not give. He took a deep breath and tried again, the sound getting fainter. If it was a person, they were getting weaker with every passing moment.

He gave one last mighty pull with all of his weight behind it and the door flew open taking him with it towards the wall. The young doctor barely managed to catch himself when he crawled over to peer into the smoke ridden Jefferey's tube though he was not prepared for the sight before him.

"Nelson?"

* * *

**Author's Note:** Oh, another cliff hanger! What more cruel and unusual punishment will I think up next for my devoted readers…hehehe. I hope you enjoyed it. "Three-quarters of the sicknesses of intelligent people come from their intelligence. They need at least a doctor who can understand this sickness."- is a quote by Marcel Proust as well as the quote at the beginning. He is one of my favorite figures in history of all time. I find his little quotes and anecdotes to be both extremely amusing at times and extremely meaningful. I hope you too enjoy them as I do. I hope you liked this chapter of the story. Any questions? Comments? Praises? Criticisms? Let me know! R & R! Thanks! 


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